How do I know if my child needs help?
 

Sometimes the answer to this question is obvious and sometimes it isn't. There is a gray area between normal and abnormal behavior with children. We expect to see an increase in anger management problems during certain developmental stages. Two year olds have a reputation for oppositional behavior, as do teenagers. Other variables that need to be taken into consideration are the uniqueness of each child, different values and behavioral expectations in families and cultural differences.

At risk children direct their anger outwardly or inwardly. The "acting out" child often exhibits problems that raise the concerns of others outside of the family. If professionals from your child's school express concerns this is certainly a red flag. Behaviors to watch out for at home include violent behavior towards self or others and destruction of property.

The "acting in" children tend to direct their anger inwardly. These children often show signs of depression. They may be withdrawn from friends and family, lose interest in normal activities, and exhibit changes in sleeping or eating patterns. These children are also the most likely to "slip through the cracks"; unless the symptoms are profound they often go unnoticed by parents and other adults.

If you are unsure if your child's anger is being expressed appropriately and within normal limits, seek outside help. Talk to other parents who have a child the same age and compare notes. Discuss your child's situation with the school counselor, clergy or other professionals. If the feedback you get confirms your concerns seek professional help.